Watch the season finale of 24 and watch HUFF!

In Monday's season finale of 24, Christopher Stapleton, star of the feature film Seclusion, will be appearing as Secret Service Agent Clark. From my understanding he will appear in the climax of the show.

And while you're at it, set your Tivo and watch HUFF on Showtime on Sunday, June 4th 10pm Pacific, 9pm Central. Missy Crider, also the star of the feature film Seclusion, will be appearing in an episode called "Tapping the Squid." Previously, she appeared in an episode called "A Cornfield Grows in LA." Catch it in reruns if you can...

Rock on...

Special thanks and apologies to Pat Angello. Mr. Angello is not only the only regular reader of Threat Watch who comments on it, he may be the only reader. He also was kind enough to let my son and I use his Avalanche tickets today as the Avs crushed the Calgary Flames. I must apologize, however, as he is a Cherry Creek High School alumnus and, well, if you read my last post, you know how I feel about that dark time in Patrick's life.

I can talk smack because the Mullen Mustangs handily defeated Cherry Creek to win the 5A state title. That same evening, my Wyoming Cowboys fought hard, but ultimately failed against the heavily-favored and NCAA-bound SDSU Aztecs.

In other good news, I have apparently been named to the unofficial Top Ten Hottest Dads list at Wilder Elementary. Sweeeeeeeet! All my campaigning finally paid off!

Hoops baby

The madness has begun.  For those of you keeping score at home, the Mullen High School Girl’s Basketball Team will be playing for the Colorado State 4A Championship Game tonight.  I’ll be there.

 

Last night, I had the pleasure of watching the Mullen High School Boy’s Basketball team frustrate the Smoky Hill High School team and earn a berth in the 5A Championship Game on Saturday.  This game has a special meaning to me as the Mullen team has three kids on it that I coached a few years back when they were in Junior High at St. Mary’s of Littleton.  The best part of it is that we weren’t even considered the best team at St. Mary’s.  All of the “good” players were on another team.  These guys stuck with it and are now playing with the best in the state.  That rocks.  Mullen also has 6’ 11’’ Providence-bound giant Ray Hall on their team who just dominates the floor.  Even with a rough night offensively and with rebounds, Ray owned the floor dictating where Smoky Hill could and could not shoot.

 

The best part about the championship for the Mullen boys is their opponent:  Cherry Creek.  I have this deep, irrational, hatred for Cherry Creek.  We have friends who probably going to end up sending their kids to Creek.  I hate that.  There is no other entity in the world that arouses such uncharacteristic emotions in me.  Dam the Creek.  Go Mustangs!

 

And to top off the basketball revelry, the Wyoming Cowboys who have been absolutely abysmal this season (13-17 overall, 5-11 in the MWC) upset the Air Force Falcons (24-6, 12-4) to move on to the next round of the MWC tournament on Saturday against Utah.  Go Pokes!  Go March!

Like any good filmphile, I watched and thoroughly enjoyed the Oscars. I love all of the pundits who take so much time to criticize the telecast. What's the freakin' point? I mean, if the Oscars were solely for entertainment value, they'd do a much different show. For one thing, they would get rid of all of those pesky awards. They tend to get in the way of watching the mimes wander around the stage. Who cares if Jon Stewart is or isn't as good as Billy Crystal? I'm not tuning in because of the host. I'm tuning in because of the films. I want to enjoy a celebration of the craft of flim making. Some other random thoughts:

I enjoyed Crash, but didn't feel it was the best pic of the year. I read Ebert's comments and he persuaded me a bit, but I'm still not convinced it was the best pic. By the same token, I'm definitely convinced Brokeback was not the best pic (see previous blogs).

Go Wyoming! If you didn't notice (and you probably didn't because you were taking a leak during this particular commercial break), Wyoming ran a tourism ad during the telecast. Go Wyoming! That is so cool. That is emblematic of Wyoming thinking. Everybody is going to be talking about Brokeback and how beautiful it us. Let's buy advertising to increase tourism. Perhaps this whole Crash/Brokeback controversy is really being stirred by some think tank in Cheyenne...

Twelve. I saw twelve of the feature films nominated for Oscars. I'm proud of that. I think it's the most I've ever seen. I even saw two of the documentary features. Cinderella Man came via Netflix a couple of weeks ago, but I'm still not interested in popping it in. Damn Russell Crowe and his mumbling.

I just saw Capote. Holy cow. I had been pulling for Joaquin, but Hoffman was amazing. Such a prick of a character. So self-centered. Amazing, amazing work. I really enjoyed the film too. It was just what I needed right now. Strangely, I came out with a feeling of... almost love - but more like humanitarianism. Capote was so human. So real. So utterly incapable of dealing with the dark side of the world in a way that resembled what we consider moral turpitude. So much like so many of us.

Pizza Hut at Kipling and Bowles

Just a quick little rant.  We went to eat at the Pizza Hut at Kipling and Bowles and had one of the absolute worst customer experiences we've had in recent memory.  Naturally, I wanted to share it with everyone who might have occasion to go to this particular Pizza Hut.

 

We get there and stand by the "Please wait to be seated sign."  We don't see anyone for a moment or two.  No big deal.  Then across the restaurant - which is not busy - we see a blonde Pizza Hut guy.  He looks over, sees us, then disappears into the kitchen.  OK, fine.  Then a dark-haired Pizza Hut guy come out carrying two pizzas out to the dining area.  We are in his way.  Instead of "Excuse me" or "Hi, excuse me, I'll be right with you" we get "Coming through."  Our kids scramble to get out of his way, but he basically just barrels through carrying these piping hot pans over the heads of my children.  OK, fine, whatever.  I overhear him say to the table, "Sorry about the wait."  Not a good sign, but we're not in a hurry.  He proceeds to walk past us again without acknowledging us.  He grabs something else from the kitchen to take back to the table.  Walks by us again without acknowledging our presence.  Then we see blonde guy again.  He walks out and takes a step toward us looking right at us.  Progress!  But no.  He stops the dark haired guy.  "Hey, you need to take this table."  And he points at us.  The dark-haired guy mumbles something.  Goes back toward the kitchen.  The blonde guy disappears.  One final time the dark-haired guy comes out of the kitchen.  And ignores us again.  So we left.

 

I love minimum wage people who don't know their place in the world.  I expect somebody owns that Pizza Hut.  And I expect that these guys were lucky to get a job there.  Bad mistake.  We eat a lot of pizza.  If I ever see Pizza Hut on some kid's resume that I have occasion to hire, I will think twice.

I don’t know what I’m more surprised by.  The fact the Walk the Line didn’t get nominated for Best Picture or that only 7 of the 12 Enron jurors have college educations.  Skilling and Lay are screwed.

 

Here’s my first pass at Oscar pic picks.  Technical categories excluded.  And other categories I don’t really care about.

 

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A LEADING ROLE:  Joaquin Phoenix will upset Hoffman.  This is Philip’s first nomination and Joaquin did not win for Gladiator and should have.

 

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE:  Clooney won’t win for director or writer, so he should win here.

 

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A LEADING ROLE:  Reese, no question.  We really don’t want a Desperate Housewife with a penis to win an Oscar.

 

PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE:  At least one foreigner must win every year.  This year, it’s Rachel Weisz.

 

BEST ANIMATED FEATURE FILM OF THE YEAR:  Wallace & Gromit, hands down.  These guys have never lost.

 

ACHIEVEMENT IN DIRECTING:  Ang Lee.

 

BEST DOCUMENTARY FEATURE:  Murderball.  Everyone will be rooting for the Penguins, but the Academy rarely likes to pick the crowd favorite here.

 

BEST MOTION PICTURE OF THE YEAR:  Brokeback Mountain.  Yawn.

 

ADAPTED SCREENPLAY:  Brokeback will win since they will get stiffed in the acting categories.   Although Capote could get the nod here also.

 

ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY:  Paul Haggis will get the nod for Crash.  In part, because he also won’t win for Director.

I figured out why Brokeback was boring to me.  I had lunch with Teddi Davis today and it dawned on me after talking to her that there was no character arc in the film.  The characters never change/grow/learn/decide anything.  It's over two hours of watching two men live their tangled lives which really aren't so tangled and never really untangle.  That's why they didn't win the SAG awards and that's why they won't win the Oscar.

 

If you haven't read Larry David's op ed piece on Brokeback, you must.  It's hilarious:  http://www.iht.com/articles/2006/01/02/opinion/eddavid.php

Saw Brokeback Mountain yesterday. I had an expectation that I would be blown away by the beauty of the film. Yada yada yada. I was bored by it. Beautifully acted, beautifully shot. Boring. Like watching two shepherds in a field. Wait...

Anyway, as someone who has spent some time in Wyoming, I feel compelled to defend the state. Brokeback paints a picture of Wyoming as a place where homosexuals are targeted for acts of hatred and violence. Is there some historic record of this I'm not aware of? I mean, other than Matthew Shepherd. (Coincidence with the last name?) I would submit that intolerance is greater in probably every other state. In Wyoming, they value privacy. Wyoming is a state of people who keep to themselves. The expectation is that everyone else should keep to themselves. Wyoming will tolerate anyone as long as they are quiet about what they do. Anyone who makes a spectacle of him or herself and thinks he or she is more important than anyone else is not going to fit in.

Wyoming was the first state to give women the vote. It was also the first state to hang a woman. In Wyoming, everyone is equal. There's a poster you can find up there with a little slogan. A young girl in the 1800s had a diary. In it, the final entry was supposedly: "God bless Wyoming, and keep her free." I can only surmise that the girl was eaten by a bear the next day...

Where are they now...

Here are some updates on what the cast of Seclusion is up to these days as they wait patiently for Seclusion to be released and increase their fame and fortune:

 

Christopher Stapleton is not only starring in a Spike TV pilot with Michael Madsen, he’s one of the writers.  In retrospect, Chris should have shaved his head for our movie and kicked the crap out of somebody…  To see a trailer, visit one of these:

High Bandwidth:  http://www.christopherstapleton.net/upload_user/DeadManTrailerHigh.mov

Medium Bandwidth:  http://www.christopherstapleton.net/upload_user/DeadManTrailerMedium.mov

Low Bandwidth:  http://www.christopherstapleton.net/upload_user/DeadManTrailerLow.mov

 

Jefferson Arca who starred as Mike Donahue (or Mike Richards depending on the draft of the script you read) is now the general manager of a bar.  Lannie’s Clocktower Caberet opens January 27 in the historic D&F Clocktower on the 16th Street Mall here in Denver.  From their website: “Lannie’s is home to Lannie Garrett, Colorado's most versatile chanteuse. This intimate nightclub showcases all of her diverse musical styles, from her swinging Big Band to her hilarious country-western spoof, ‘The Patsy DeCline Show.’”  When you go, tell Jefferson you know me and he’ll give you a free drink.  (You may have to give him $6 to remind him who I am).  Visit http://www.lannies.com for more info.  Oh, and Jefferson is still acting. 

 

The lovely Missy Crider has announced her engagement to Danny Kastner.  Fans of the Apprentice will know Danny as the guy with the guitar from season III.  Best wishes to the happy couple!

Disney loves Pixar

I am so happy that my kids are old enough now that we don't have to see every Disney film that comes out - whether in the theater or on DVD.  In our short tenure, we've had to sit through enough Disney crap.  Other than The Tigger Movie, the Pooh revivals have been disgraceful.  I actually fell asleep during the sequel to Peter Pan.  The straight to DVD stuff has been worse. 

 

The only bright light in animated entertainment has been Pixar.  Down the line, we've enjoyed every single Pixar film.  Now, there are excessive rumors that Pixar and Disney might merge.  Uggg.  http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/2006/01/20/BUGLAGQ6FP1.DTL&type=business

 

I hate to say it, but Disney is creatively bankrupt.  There is nothing left.  If Pixar merges with them I fear that they will suck all of their creativity into a morass of dumbed down poppycock.  Just say no, Mr. Jobs.  Please.  For the kids sake.  I understand the desire to get your sequels back.  Disney will probably ruin those.  Find another way.  Don't let your culture be assimilated.

New Year's Resolutions, I have decided, are pointless wastes of time. Not so much because they are quickly abandoned, but because so many people delude themselves into thinking that they are really going to make their life better in the new year. Get over yourself. Your life will not be any better this year just because you will it into being.

Your life will be better if, and only if, you make plans. Make a decision and make a plan. Do something with your life. And quit telling me what you're going to do. Just do it.

The ball has dropped. Another year is upon us. I hope to spend this new year as I spent this year. Taking chances. Spending time with people who take chances. Teaching my kids to take chances.

Find your brilliance.

I've been so overwhelmed this year by the overwhelming support and the generosity of so many of the people in my life. Words can hardly express what I feel. I hope I can return the karma that's been given to me. I hope I can continue the magic.

Chronicles of Narnia anti-Semitic?

The Chronicles of Narnia really disappointed me this
weekend. We had high hopes, based on the trailer,
that the film would some sort of great epic and in the
end, the film just fell flat.

What was it missing? Jon Favreau. Zathura went so
much farther in establishing a believable kids fantasy
adventure. Zathura also did something that the
Chronicles did not. Within the first five minutes,
you understood who the kids were - i.e. what are there
strengths and quirks – and what the pressure in their
life was. Chronicles only established the latter.
These British kids have a dad who is at war and they
are being shipped off to the country. I could not
find a single distinguishable character trait until
they put their crowns on at the end and the movie told
us what their character traits were. I never felt the
plight of these kids. I guess you had to read the
book, which I did not. And will not.

So I do have to give Walden Media credit for their
marketing. $67 million for an opening weekend is
terrific. Mr. Dobson and his Focus on the Family and
every Christian church in the country are touting this
as a great, Christian film. In my humble opinion,
this film is really no more Christian than Lord of the
Rings. Or Star Wars. Or the Star Trek where Spock
dies. The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the
few. This is a common story device in all literature
and film. The hero has to go through hell to save the
world. Someone dies only to rise again. The same
story appears in every religious mythology in one form
or another. There is nothing uniquely Christian about
the Chronicles of Narnia other than what people have
told us is uniquely Christian. An impartial observer
might disagree that there is any Christian content
whatsoever.

So Mel Gibson’s Passion was criticized for its
portrayal of Jews. If you go along with the marketing
and Aslan is a thinly veiled symbol of Christ, then
his crucifixion scene has some real anti-Semitic
overtones. In the Passion, the Jews were at least
portrayed as people. In the Chronicles of Narnia, the
persecutors of Christ – the Jews – are portrayed as a
bunch of bloodthirsty creatures. Minotaur and
Cyclops. Warthogs. Angry dwarves. Not exactly an
“everyone can be forgiven” mentality. In the end,
Aslan resurrects all of the “good” creatures. None of
the “bad” creatures are saved. Doesn’t seem very
Christian, but it is a worldview that I suppose most
Christian churches ascribe to. Be saved or die.

My Stolen Laptop

So I stupidly left my laptop outside of a meeting room
at the Westin Tabor Center hotel
(westin.com/taborcenter) and while I was in the
meeting, someone walked by the room, grabbed my laptop
bag and another laptop inside someone else's bag.
There's a couple of ironies here.

The meeting was for XPAC, Xcel Energy's political
action committee. Attending the meeting were several
high-ranking Xcel Energy executives as well as two
high-ranking Colorado State Senators. Law makers
inside. Criminals outside.

I guess I figured that given the audience and the
Westin's reputation that my laptop would be safe. I
can't say that I thought much about the decision. I
take full responsibility for my actions. I wish the
same could be said for all those involved.

The Westin was one of the official hotels for the NBA
All-Star game and they also seem to be the hotel of
choice for visiting sports teams and rock stars. The
Westin folks I dealt with were very nice, but
completely ineffectual. One person told me that there
was no security camera in the area where the theft
took place. When I talked to the head of Security he
said they had a camera there. When he reviewed the
footage, they couldn't identify a suspect. So, either
the first Westin guy or the second Westin guy was
lying to me about the existence of the camera. I
wonder if the thief was aware of the lack of security
cameras there. Inside job perhaps?

For their part, the Denver Police have been completely
useless. They were too busy to come down to the
Westin to allow me to file a report. I had to file
one online and I have absolutely no expectation that I
will even hear from a real person. Apparently,
they’re too busy covering up their own crimes to
investigate new ones. Or maybe they’re getting rid of
panhandlers… Nope. They're still there. Come on
Looper, let’s get this city up to par!

I’m still waiting to hear back from my insurance
company also. We’ll wait before we rant on them…
They're going to give me money…

Regardless, if you are in the laptop stealing
business, I would recommend that you go to the
conference room on the second floor on the west side
of the Westin. It's the one whose entrance is
directly across from the entrance to the Tabor Center,
near the ESPN Zone. With luck, you'll encounter a
meeting going on with attendees as stupid as I was and
you can make off with whatever they leave behind, like
a raccoon going through the trash. If you need a
winter coat, there should be a full coat rack there.
Incidentally, the Tabor Center has a camera in their
hallway leaving the hotel, but it's pointed at the
ESPN Zone. So don't turn around if you leave that
way, and you’ll be fine.

And to the person who took my laptop or to anyone who
can recover my 12 in. iBook G4 and all of my data,
there is a reward. Contact me. No questions asked.
If you don’t contact me and I happen to find out who
you are, I will remove your... wait... can't post an
actual threat... might be used as evidence... if the
police investigate...

What does it say about a FILM fest when the biggest FILM star you can get to appear is David Schwimmer?

To all of our friends near 120th and Lowell, you simply must visit The Exchange Tavern (www.exchangetavern.com). The proprieters - Teddi and Gary Davis - are two of our dearest friends, kindred spirits, and co-producers on Seclusion.

The Exchange is a lifelong dream for them (although certainly not their only dream). I am very proud of what they put together. No detail has been overlooked. The place looks great, has great employees, great food, great drinks, great uniforms... If only it weren't 192 blocks away from my house I would be there every night...

It is truly amazing to watch the germination of an idea sprout a reality that is so cool. The lesson for all of us is to dream big and work your ass off. Whatever you want, you can have it. Leap and the net will appear.

I raise my glass to you, Teddi and Gary.

Look! I've added Adsense from Google. Click above to somehow eventually put money in my pocket. Email me if you are against this brash commercialization. But before you email me, click there and check it out. I don't know how it works, but what the hell, I'll try it.

It's sad when one begins to view Blogging as one views confesstion...

The short story: business. We've been knee-deep in finding our final investors and finishing Seclusion. We're at the finish line. Much to tell very soon. The film looks great. I'm very happy with the result. If you haven't already discovered the link, visit www.voteroberthamilton.com to see the trailer.

Rock on.

Spotless News

Spotless, co-written by me, will be screening in
Toronto during the Toronto International Film
Festival.

In other related news, Spotless director James Kelsey
has announced that he and his girlfriend are having a
baby putting to bed any rumors of James' inability to
conceive. Congratulations James!

September 13-15
Press Release #1
August 25, 2005

HD Showcase and DigiScreen high definition screenings
“off Broadway” during Toronto International Film
Festival
New technology by New Filmmakers 6 feature films and
14 short form films

HD Showcase has been a leader in the placement of high
definition content for over 4 years. DigiScreen
develops and operates innovative low-cost technologies
for enabling networks of High Definition cinemas to
present independent films and multimedia content. “As
this technology secures its place in the theatrical
world, it will become more and more important for
buyers to understand and appreciate its advantages,”
states president Susan Soares.

We are showcasing 6 feature films and 14 shorts
originated and projected in stunning high definition.
The schedule will be posted at the end of the week and
reservations will be made for qualified buyers only.
The features are Novem, In Plain Sight, Katie Bird:
Certifiable Crazy Person, Sonata, Spotless and The
Rest of Your Life. The shorts are Filters, Karma
Ghost, The Journey, On the Couch, Embryo, Small
Change, Hold the Rice, Perfect Sec-Illusion, Evenfall,
Natural Selection, F*@k the Movie, Confessions of a
Late Bloomer, Clowns, and Daddy's Boy.

Our Showcase will be at Atom Egoyan’s Camera Bar.
CAMERA is a unique bar, lounge and Screening Gallery
located on Queen Street West in Toronto.

Address: 1028 Queen Street West (just west of
Ossington)
Toronto ON M6J 1H6
Telephone: 416.530.0011
September 13th through 15th 2005
From 2PM until midnight

For reservations email Susan@HD-Showcase.com
Trailers @ www.HD-Showcase.com
Questions? 310.540.6639 or 310.540.6631
mobile 310.923.3857